What I learned from my vacation

You may wonder why I hadn’t been writing for the past week and a half or so. Well, I have been on a siesta and have taken a vacation. However, being on vacation has not stopped me from continuing to learn about the world around me and how to better it. I met many amazing and interesting people during my vacation, including two men having the same name as my favorite manager ( see also: Qualities of my favorite manager)! Here are some of the things that I learned about this particular vacation that can be applied by almost everyone in everyday life (not just on vacations!).

  1. How beautiful God made this world.—On this vacation, I was fortunate and blessed enough to witness some of God’s beautiful creatures. Some of the most interesting things I saw in nature were: waterfalls, birds, flowers, and many, many trees! All these things reminded me how blessed we all are to live on such a beautiful planet. This vacation also has helped motivate me to be more environmentally conscious to help preserve the earth. Even a sunrise and a sunset each day have beauty not only because of the bright colors but also because it is a reminder that we are indeed able to still be alive on this planet and make some positive difference in this world!
  2. Get to know people before you judge them. This will enable hearts to be opened to receive love and respect.—At first, when we met the people with us on our trip, most people seemed more reserved and kept to themselves more. However, as time went on and we did more together, people seemed to be increasingly open and friendly to each other. When people let down their guards and set aside their initial impressions, I learned that this allowed us to love and respect each other more because we better understood where the other was coming from and thus were more open and willing to learn from each other.  I believe that if we all strived to really get to know and understand people better before having any type of snap judgment against them, this world would be a much more unified and loving place.
  3. When we strive to understand each other, rather than be selfish or rude, love can thrive and grow!—I admit that when things don’t go my way, I am very tempted to become self-focused. However, when I try to understand others better, I found that my love for them grows as God’s love and compassion in me are able to better flow through me, rather than my selfish, sinful self. The same goes for everyone else. I have been blessed to see people from my trip reach out to one another in unexpected ways, such as a.) Someone on our trip took pictures for someone when they were unable to so that they would remember the good times had with the other members of our trip. B.) The tour leader offering to help people with their flights and accommodations, often going above and beyond to make this possible. He also checked the weather the day before so to make sure no flights were being canceled or delayed, and if they were, he let us know in a prompt manner. C) Someone offering their seat in the front, so that others could sit there too.  These little things and more helped me to gain love and respect for everyone on this trip. What good deed can you do for the people that you encounter today? What have others done for you to gain your love and respect for them?

Overall, this vacation I took has been one of the best and most rewarding thus far. I will strive never to forget these lessons that I believe God has taught me and all the people on my trip that have touched my life in a very special way. Have you ever had the chance to take a memorable vacation or have you met remarkable people in your life before? Please feel free to discuss in the comments.

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How To Fight Against Human Degradation

According to writer Jon Bloom, from DesiringGod.org, Playboy magazine founder, Hugh Hefner, who died about a week ago at the age of 91, “destroyed millions [of souls].” This is because he was known to propel the pornography industry from its dark dungeons into mainstream society today, with all its philosophies and fantasies.  Indeed, as a society, we have delved into the depths of apathy and selfishness. With these vices, naturally, humans are being degraded at an alarming rate.  There are 45 million slaves in the world today. That is more than five times the population of New York City! Many of them are being sold to be instruments of men’s disgusting, unspeakable “pleasures.” Even if one is not in slavery, there are still many ways humans are being degraded, from the words people use to describe each other to how some people physically attack another.  If we are to value each other and bring hope and love back to the entire human race, change must start with us.  We must, as Mathma Ghandi has said in numerous sources, “Be the change you want to see in the world.” Here are some practical ways I find that are effective in fighting against human degradation and devaluation.:

  1. Value and take time to verbally (and also in writing) thank the people who have made a positive impact in your life. –Many people, whether at home, at school, in the workplace, or in any other place of service, don’t hear many words of appreciation when they do something positive and are condemned almost instantly when they do something even just a bit wrong or sinful. Even if you think these people already have been acknowledged, thank them for their positive role in your life anyway. Not only is it good manners, it could make someone’s day-and even influence positively the trajectory of the person’s entire life!
  2. Never ever use someone just for your own benefit and pleasure.–We all have been guilty of this in one way or another.  For instance, if you are only friends with someone just to get something from them, STOP! Not only are you reducing their humanity, but you are also being fake.  Be genuine and aware of your motives for doing things. If you want to care for or be kind to someone, be sure you are doing it with no strings attached.  Do it for the sake of doing right to them and because you want them to be happy, not to get something out from them. Doing kind things without expecting anything in return also motivates us to continue doing so, even if things get tough or if the recipient is ungrateful.
  3. Support social justice organizations like International Justice Mission or A21, which work to help free people who have been sold into sexual or other types of slavery and that help them rebuild their lives.–You can either contribute financially or volunteer your time in some way to these organizations, so their good work can continue. You can also spread the word about these organizations and about the seriousness of the human trafficking problem by signing petitions, organizing awareness marches, bringing it up in conversation, and if you are spiritual, praying for these organizations and the people they are helping.
  4. Refrain from supporting or participating in any form of human degradation.–This means everything from refusing to look at any pornographic images to standing up for anyone who is being bullied or abused in any way.  For instance, if you see someone bullying someone else at school or in the workplace, condemn the act immediately and stand up for the victim! Do not be a bystander or even worse, participate in the bullying or teasing yourself!  Also, do not support any media platform which glorifies the degradation of others in any way.  For instance, if a movie or television show promotes or romanticizes people being degraded, either physically or verbally, don’t watch it!  This is why I personally have made a commitment to not knowingly watch a movie or television show that emphasizes and promotes sexual and other types of violence anymore.  There is way too much degradation and devaluation in the “real world” already, why would I want it to enter my fantasy life too? This is not to be “prudish” or to judge those that enjoy watching or listening to these types of things, but to emphasize the need for all of us, me included, to value people more by thinking of people as beings with precious souls, not tools to be used for our own selfish desires.

Human degradation is a big problem in the world today, but if we each do our part to help combat it, the devaluation will slowly fade away. Yes, it seems like a gargantuan task to accomplish, and no one can fight this alone.  Together, though, we can each do something small (i.e.. eating a giant candy bar, one bite at a time, so to speak) to chip away at this problem. Then, the people around us will feel more valued and loved again, and they will see that there is still love and hope in this world.

sources:

1)http://www.desiringgod.org/articles/one-man-s-dream-destroyed-millions

2) https://www.ijm.org/slavery

Value- a poem

 

Value – 9/29/2017

*based on the quote by Jefferson Bethke, which says, “People are neighbors to be loved, not commodities to be used.”

I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well.- Psalm 139:14 (KJV)

 

You are precious in His sight

You are certainly worth the fight

The fight called life

Including the joys and the strife

 

You are more valuable

Than just a toy to be used

Or something to be abused

Or tossed away like trash

 

You are more valuable

Than silver or gold

Or all the riches of this world

Or anything you can behold

 

Never let anyone tell you

That you don’t matter

Because you are so valued, my friend

And you will be loved until the end

Biggest Lie Society Taught Me To Believe (and how to counter it)

Disclaimer: This post is inspired by a question asked of writer Todd Brison on Quora. You can find his website here.

The lie that society has taught me to believe since I was about two years old when I was rejected by people at a daycare center, is that one’s worth is dependent on how much you accomplish and/or are to other people. Maybe there are some of you who have or are still believing this very lie. It’s easy to believe, especially if you live in a developed country like I do. The phrase “pull yourself up by your own bootstraps,” comes from this mentality. It says that, basically, we should be self-made and need minimal, if any, help from others. This mentality also does not take into account or value those who are disabled or otherwise cannot do certain things all by themselves. It may see people who need help of any kind as  “weaker,” more “useless,” or somehow “less valuable,” than their able-bodied counterparts.  The only benefit to believing this lie is that it forces you to be diligent and not lazy. However, the drawbacks, in my mind, are not worth this benefit.  First of all, it devalues people. It not only devalues the disabled or sick but also everyone else because it reduces our worth to be only what we do and if we are “useful” to society or not. Racism and other forms of prejudice derive from this mentality that other people are worth less because of what they do or don’t do in society.  Also, this lie is a form of pride.  Believing this lie does not allow one to get the help and support they need, because of the stigma of shame and embarrassment of feeling “worthless”  if they admit they need help. If one accomplishes success in society’s eyes, this person may become arrogant and look down upon others. Finally, this lie sometimes influences people to spend their life on things that are not as essential, such as becoming a workaholic to the expense of his or her health and loved ones.  Because this society is accomplishment driven, some people may chase after money, power, sex, or work to the point of being obsessed with them and delve into becoming an addict, which is never good.  If this society based someone’s worth more on how they beautiful and unique they are, for instance, instead of just what they can contribute to society, this wouldn’t be such an issue.

Here are some ways we can counter this lie and its effects:

  1. Value people.–I have written several times on how we should value people. For these posts see this and this.  However, it is worth repeating.  One way we can value people more is to thank people for the good that they do to us and others. For instance, if you see a colleague or a boss take the initiative to help you with some of your work because they see it may overwhelm you, say ” Thank you. I appreciate your help.”  They are not obligated to help you, but the fact that they did anyway needs to be acknowledged not only for their sake but also for yours as well.  Another way we can value people is to encourage people when they feel upset or depressed. Tell and show people that they are still worthy of love even if they don’t accomplish everything they desire or hope.
  2. Demonstrate and encourage humility.–One way to demonstrate humility is to genuinely apologize when you make a mistake or offend someone. Never say, “I’m sorry, but…,” because you are just excusing what you did, which is not a real apology.  The correct way to apologize and make amends with someone you offended is to a.) I am sorry I did x and that I hurt you by doing x. I will promise to try to never do that again. Will you forgive me?” b.) Work to not only offer restitution for the loss the offended party incurred by your mistake or sin but also to never offend them again. Another way to show humility is to be willing to be vulnerable. Never be afraid to ask for someone else’s help or admit that you are not perfect.  Yes, it is a risk sometimes. Many people aren’t willing to be vulnerable because they are afraid of what others will think of them and that they will be rejected. That used to be me too in the past. Now, I am not so afraid anymore, because I now know that their opinion really doesn’t matter. It is what God thinks of me that really counts. Also, the people that reject us for being vulnerable and honest with them are probably insecure themselves, and striving to please them is really a waste of time because they will never be satisfied with anything we can give them anyway.
  3. Be successful in things that will matter for eternity, or for your eternal memory, not just on things that will only last in your earthly life.–Yes, it is good to be successful at one’s job or career, or get good grades. I don’t object to this at all. In fact, I encourage it!  However, what I’m saying is don’t focus so much on worldly success that you miss what really counts or what memory you will leave on this earth after your life ends.  In order to be truly successful, I believe one of the things people should focus on besides God is the relationships you have on this earth with other people. How are you treating those you profess to love or care about? This is something I think (me included) can do better. Do not be so focused on worldly goals that you miss the eternal and the spiritual, and your relational goals.

If we do these three things, this lie can be seen for the farce it is. People are inherently valuable, not because they can do a lot of good for us, or even the world, but because each person is unique and special in how they were created to be. Value and cherish others today, and never think that we are only as good as what we do.

Things I Learned in Childhood

I know I don’t talk much about my childhood. Although compared to many people, I had a pretty happy childhood, I did experience some trauma, mostly at the hands of peers my age. However, I did learn some valuable life lessons that I carry to this day when dealing with situations in my life.  These three things have shaped how I see the world, with some modifications, of course:

  1. Don’t avoid or neglect to do something just because you don’t like to do that thing. Do it efficiently and quickly the first time, so you don’t have to do more later. –I was talking to one of my managers last night, and he was amazed that I am consistently the first one to arrive at the straightening (even though I must admit, sometimes I hate it), and one of the first one to get things done. What I failed to tell him at the time, was why I do this.  This motivation actually stemmed from an incident in fourth or fifth grade when I consistently failed to do the assigned readings on the Gold Rush each day because I hated it. I mean, I hated the book! It was as boring as reading a how-to manual on assembling something one doesn’t care about.  However, the time came where I had to present something from that book.  I knew if I didn’t at least skim the book, that I would probably fail the whole class, and my parents would be absolutely furious at me for not even trying. I quickly gathered up as much information as I could from gleaning the book, and passed the project presentation by the skin of my teeth (i.e to my parents’ satisfaction).  From then on, I never tried to avoid doing something unpleasant if it was important just because I didn’t like doing said thing.  I might do it reluctantly or just to get it over with sometimes, but I will do it so I don’t have to stress out in the end.  During this past year as I have grown in my faith and love of Jesus Christ and others,  I have also tried to find something pleasurable in that unpleasant task and remind myself that I am to do said thing with excellence so that it pleases God and because it is the right thing to do.
  2. Kids can be cruel, but sometimes adults are too.  –I won’t name any names of course, but there were some teachers I observed that were mean to others and me. Maybe they weren’t always deliberately cruel, but sometimes would lash out in anger or because they were too stressed out to respond in a calm and validating way.  There were a few students that were particularly disruptive in their behavior. They did things like talk out of turn in class, spit on students, or fail to do their homework.  Some(not all) of the teachers that I observed didn’t even try to figure out why they behaved that way, and just started disciplining them and a few even mocked them a few times! None of the teachers, from what I observed, even took the time to actually care for and encourage these students very much when they behaved well. I was mocked by a few teachers from everything from my ethnicity to the way I dressed. I have seen this scenario repeated even in some of the places where I have worked, sadly enough.  These events from my childhood shaped my view in that now I get angry (even rageful sometimes) at people who mock others for things that can’t be controlled or that I think don’t matter in the face of eternity.  Sometimes, I must confess that I even thought (but not done) of taking vengeance on the perpetrators on behalf of the victims of the bullies.  These events have also motivated me to care more about people who are hurting, partly so that this scenario I witnessed in childhood does not repeat itself in any way again.
  3. Sometimes you must compromise to be able to successfully work with others, but never compromise your moral beliefs and values. –When I was maybe in fourth grade and below, I used to want everything done efficiently and my way, so much so that one of my peers told me in no uncertain terms that I was difficult to work with, and that comment cut to the heart and I remember it to this day.  Sometimes I hated working in groups, because a.) No one would choose to work with me, and I had to work with random people I didn’t know or care about. b.) Either the person ended up wanting to take over everything, leaving me with nothing to do, or I had to do everything because the person wasn’t willing to carry his or her weight.  However, these experiences of working in groups with different and random people from my classes prepared me to deal with people in the “real” world.  These experiences taught me that I had to compromise and allow for others’ ideas because it was not all about me and getting things done my way.  In the process, I may have even learned a thing or two and understood others’ perspectives better.  These experiences were valuable to help me cope with other associates and customers that I interact with today!

These are three things that I learned in childhood that I consistently apply to my life today.  These lessons have proved valuable in helping me be a more successful and well-adjusted person. What lessons have you learned in your childhood that you still carry today? How have they been applied to your life? Please feel free to discuss in the comments.

How God’s Love Has Changed My Life

When someone or something comes into your life and just changes the course of it forever, they will leave an indelible mark on who you are and the way you see things.  This is what God has done for me personally when He came into my life nearly seventeen years ago.  The more I have gotten to know God, the more He has changed me, and thus my life as well. Here are some ways He has done just that:

  1. He has worked in and through me to help me love people more.–As I have shared in previous posts, before God’s love took hold of my life, I was a very selfish and rigid person. As far as I can remember, as a young child, I don’t really recall me being very compassionate and caring of others. I did not understand why a lot of people refused to be friends with me. However, when God took hold of me, all that changed. Hearing stories about adults being abused as children and some of my peers getting bullied started to really bother and upset me, whereas before I didn’t care as much.  God even showed me the pain some ex-churchgoers experienced as a result of being hurt by professing Christians in churches, and that caused me to help others as I had never done before. In this past year especially, God has really been teaching me how to live more and more for Him and others, and less for just myself.  He is teaching me that I have to sacrifice my own conveniences and comforts for the benefit of others, especially if it would help them.
  2. God has revealed to me things that I need to change about myself and has given me the motivation to change.–The more God has taught me about Himself, life, and myself, the more I realize that I still have a long road ahead of me. This has given me the motivation to continually improve myself and strive for excellence in everything I do because if I thought there was nothing left to improve about myself, I would have little motivation to learn and become better. I don’t believe God reveals these things because He is tyrannical or wanting to smite us but for our own good, as to help us not to hinder our own relationships.  This fact, coupled with the fact, that I believe He is merciful, has helped me want to change for the better.
  3. God’s love has brought me tremendous blessings and abundant joy.—The more I know of God’s love, the more I realize how blessed I am. Yes, things get very difficult for me sometimes, and yes I have been through some trials and struggles. However, I consider myself blessed.  Before God’s love really started to shape and mold me, I had few friends.  I felt alone and was lost.  Now, God has blessed me with the type of support and love through Himself, other Christians, and other good friends of various faiths, that I had never thought existed!  For the first time in my life, I felt understood and loved by people other than just my immediate family!  He has also provided me with a good job in which I can do well.  His love has given me the freedom to enjoy His natural and human creations.  I now feel that I can better enjoy life without fear of being alone and abandoned, and I have the confidence and trust that He will always provide for me no matter what. His love has only proved that!

These are the major ways that God has changed my life.  One of the pastors at my church taught that God’s love for us will never cease and will never go away.  This is the confidence which I personally strive to live my life and share with others. How has God or a loved one’s love changed you? Please feel free to discuss in the comments.

Why Care: Finding Meaning in Life


Being presumptuous, according to my pastor, Pastor David Shoaf (and I agree with him), is having a rebellious and/or an “I-don’t-care” attitude about life and morals.  Many people who have been presumptuous about life or about grievous sins (moral wrongdoing) in my experience, have gone to either jail or have died! For instance, people in ISIS who bomb innocent people just going about their daily lives because they don’t agree with the precepts of their religion have at least a degree of presumptuousness.  They don’t care if their targets have families or what pain in their lives they carry. They just kill because their god told them to (supposedly).  Even though few people are as callous and as uncaring as ISIS suicide bombers or the most vicious murderers out there, we all (me included) need to be cautious of having a presumptuous attitude about life and about morals.  Here is why we should care–particularly about others and what kind of life we are leading. :

  1. Caring about others and the legacy we want to leave brings purpose and meaning to our lives.–Personally, before I became a Christian, I was very selfish and was searching for purpose and meaning in my life. Now, I don’t mean that people who don’t share my Christian faith are selfish and uncaring. On the contrary, I know a lot of people of various beliefs other than my own, who are extremely caring and selfless too. It’s just for me, that was my experience.  However, what I am saying is that if we don’t care about others and what legacy we are leaving, life will feel empty and meaningless.  When I got to that point, I felt like life was no longer worth living.  You can only live for just yourself for so long until you start to think about, “What am I doing? Why am I here with everyone else, when they are not benefiting me?” However, when you start to live for the benefit of others and you start to build a lasting legacy that you want others to follow, life starts to become more exciting because you have an end goal or goals in mind that you want to strive for regularly!
  2. Caring for others and leaving a good legacy changes the world.–One of my faith heroes, Rachel Joy Scott, changed millions of lives because she lived a life of caring for others, especially those who were friendless or otherwise in need. Over 1,000 people attended her funeral, and it was televised on CNN.  Some sources even say it was more attended than the funeral of Princess Diana!  Her father, Darrell Scott, also founded an organization called “Rachel’s Challenge,” which helps promote the lifestyle that Rachel led and discourage bullying.  This organization coupled with Rachel’s influence from her writings and the life she led have helped millions of people.  (source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rachel_Scott) When you care for others from your heart, you can change the world for the positive. If you don’t quit caring and living for good, you will leave a good legacy for others to follow after your time on earth is up. I am striving to live to that end. Yes, I may fail (sometimes lots of times). However, when we fail, we have to just get back up and try again and persevere to the end.
  3. Caring for others and leaving a good legacy is ultimately joyful and rewarding.–Even if caring for others sometimes gets exhausting or people don’t appreciate you right away, to care for others ultimately brings you joy and has its rewards.  Seeing others joyful because they know someone (perhaps you!) cares about them ultimately should bring you joy as well.  That is its own reward! Not only that, but a few people may follow your example as well!  This will start a chain reaction of more people caring enough to change the world for the positive and not being apathetic about others or about life. People will start to respect us more because they know we can be counted on to care.

To care about others and about the legacy we are leaving for others to follow are very important because this is one of the major ways we derive meaning to our lives, changes the world, and is ultimately joyful and rewarding not only to the ones we care about but also to us as well.  Who needs your care today? Who can you show love to today?  What legacy do you want to leave? Please feel free to discuss in the comments.

When We Have to Do Something: Caring for others in trouble

Earthquakes. Famines. Wars and rumors of wars.  Pestilences.  Heartache. Betrayal. Strife among people. Hatred and apathy. The problems in the world can seem very overwhelming at times. When we compound it with our own problems, they can seem unbearable! In fact, sometimes things can seem so insurmountable, we do and say nothing.  We are paralyzed with fear and anguish.  However, all these things can also propel us to right action, if we know how to help some of those in need.  Here are some situations either in the world around us or perhaps in our own lives that can seem “big” or “heavy,”  but we can redeem for the benefit of those involved in these problems. Here’s how YOU can personally make a difference:

The natural disasters in the world

  1. If you are spiritual, pray for those affected by the wildfires in California and surrounding areas, the hurricanes that have ravaged or are ravaging Texas, parts of Lousiana, Florida, Puerto Rico, and the Carribean Islands.  Pray that they will be provided with all that they need and for replacement of all that was lost. Pray for peace, comfort, and strength for those affected by the storms and their families that are concerned about them.
  2. Donate to a reputable organization that will give (and are giving) to those in need in the affected areas.  Some of them are: a.) Red Cross b.) Convoy of Hope c.) others. <—this article of organizations focuses on relief for Hurricane Harvey, but many of these help people affected by the other disasters as well.
  3. If you can, go to these affected areas and volunteer in the rebuilding and the relief efforts there.
  4. Spread awareness for these people being ravaged by these catastrophic events.  Let people know that these people are hurting and in need of help. That way, everyone will be aware of what’s happening and can also help in any way they are able.

Those affected by abuse and bullying

  1. Never ever blame the abuse or bullying survivor for the abuse. — Remind them that the abuse was not their fault.  Abuse is totally and will always be the abuser’s fault.  They are able to control their actions. No one can make someone else abuse another.
  2. Encourage the survivor of their inherent value.-– Many times abuse survivors have been made to feel worthless and useless, even unworthy of love.  If we want to be allies to these people, we remind them of their inherent pricelessness again!  This not only means that if they do something right, praise them, but also reminding and demonstrating to them they are still priceless and loved even if they make a mistake or sin. We can do this by helping them through their failures and doubts, and by striving to be committed to being there for them whenever they need us.
  3. Make sure to model good boundaries to them.— This means striving not to control or manipulate them in any way. Bullied and abused people usually (if not always) have had their boundaries or safety violated in some way, and their trust shattered.  Do not attempt to make decisions for them, unless you are already in a position of authority over them. Never use them to your own ends, otherwise, they will feel abused all over again, by you!  For instance, if you want to show affection to them, but they are hesitant to, respect them and restrain your wants and desires.  This is not about you! If you wrong them or make a mistake, sincerely apologize to them and commit to never repeating the same mistake again. Show you can be trusted.

EDIT: Many, but NOT all, people who have been abused also struggle with mental health issues because of the trauma. It is important to note though, that NOT all people with mental health problems have been abused. But if someone you know has been abused AND is struggling with mental illness, this is a GREAT resource: https://ashipofmyownmaking.wordpress.com/2017/09/12/10-ways-you-can-help-a-mentally-ill-friend/

Those affected by poverty

  1. Donate to reputable organizations such as the Red Cross and Unicef. –These organizations help by giving much-needed food and water to those in need.
  2. When you give to them, expect nothing back.–When you give to the poor, whether your time or finances, make sure it is with pure motives. Do not give to them, just to get a tax break, or to get something in return from them later.  Give because it is the right thing to do. Give because it gives you joy to see them happy and fulfilled. Do it for them, not yourself.
  3. Volunteer at a soup kitchen, homeless shelter or other organization—Look for opportunities in your area to help those affected by poverty.  One organization, for those living in the Chicagoland area, is called Feed My Starving Children. They pack food for people in need around the world. You can help by volunteering to help pack these meals. Their website is: https://volunteer.fmsc.org/register/
  4. Spread awareness about the issue of poverty.–Write about the struggles of people living in poverty, not to embarrass or shame them, but so that people will know how serious an issue it is, and also to dispel myths about people living in poverty. I know a lot of people who think that if you live in poverty, you must be lazy and/or uneducated. However, I have found through my own research and listening to others’ experiences, that this is often not the case, and the causes of poverty are more complicated that one thinks.

These are just some ways to care about people in need. What are some ways you can think of to help those in need? Encourage and love someone today. You can perhaps help save a life!

People are Gifts: How to Value Others

This is a kind of part two to the post about how you are precious.  So,  not only we are precious, but others around us are as well. I have often observed in society a disturbing trend where some people are treating others as if they were disposable. Sometimes, I must admit, that I am tempted to do the same. I have heard disturbing stories about parents who have abused and/or killed their child or children in the name of convenience or revenge on their ex-partner or spouse.  In the workplace, I have heard of countless cases where the work being done is not ever appreciated or met with a “thank you,” but instead criticized or complained about because it isn’t met to perfect standards. Divorce and infidelity in marriage are very commonplace, especially here in the U.S, but other countries it is starting to become more common as well. How do we then take a stand against treating others as disposable and instead treating them like the gifts they are? Here are a few things I found effective in us leading the way in treating other people with value and dignity, instead of as commodities for our own selfish pleasures:

  1. View people as gifts to be treasured instead of commodities or annoyances.– What if we looked at each person we encountered today as a gift from God instead of as an inconvenience or as a commodity? I believe that every person we encounter is sent to teach us something about ourselves or about life. If we get to engage with a loved one or a friend, he or she is teaching us the value of joy, love, and friendship. If we have to engage with a difficult person, he or she is teaching us to be patient and challenging us how to love without expecting anything back.  Also, every person we encounter, I believe, is put in our paths for a reason. For instance, I believe I met my current manager *Chris (NOT his real name) not only so I could get a job but also teach me how to love better and so God could refine my character through him, and help me grow in my job there. The pastors at my church were put on my life’s path (I believe) to help me further grow in my faith and to help support me in my life’s journey. Also, the pastors have helped me think of others more and I was put on their path to help serve with them too.
  2. Be grateful for every person who does something good, either to you or for the benefit of others.— At my job, for instance, if a customer goes out of their way to help me pick up a display that I accidentally dropped, I would say something like, ” Thank you for going out of your way to help me pick the display items up. I really appreciate that.” The customer doesn’t have to do that for me, but if he or she does, it shows that he or she is a decent and caring person, and we should applaud people like that, not only because they deserve it but also to encourage them to continue their thoughtful actions.  If your child (if you are a parent) does something praiseworthy like cleaning up their room without being asked, or helping you cook a meal, you should teach them gratitude by expressing yours.  This will not only lift the child’s spirit but also model gratitude that they can and should imitate if they see someone else do good to them or to others they care about.
  3. Know that each person is unique and cannot be replaced by anyone.–In a society where people are often not valued, we often fall for the lie that someone can be replaced by someone else.  Yes, in a job situation, people are replaced all the time by others. Even so, we should be careful not to fall into this “replacement mentality” and let it influence how we treat other people.  For instance, I had often wanted people I didn’t like or didn’t get along with to be replaced by another “nicer” person. I did not care about learning from them (much to my disadvantage) or finding value in them. This is how most people I have encountered think.  However, if I had instead thought about how I could learn from them and how even they are unique and special, I would have been able to get out of that negative mindset sooner.  No one, not even identical twins, has exactly the same DNA as another.  Everyone is unique. Treat others as precious, because once someone is gone from this earth, you won’t see them on this side of the dirt again.

These are some ways we can value each person as precious. We all have value, even the people we don’t like or see eye to eye with all the time.  Everyone is a gift to be treasured. Enjoy and value your gifts today!

Why YOU are precious

With approximately 6 billion people on this planet, it is easy to feel overlooked and unimportant to everyone, or anyone, for that matter. Feeling overlooked and unappreciated can lead one to take desperate measures to feel more loved and important, such as conforming to one’s peer group even if they don’t agree with what is being said or done, or doing something, positive or negative, to gain someone else’s love and appreciation. Some have already given up the search, and have delved into addiction and numbing, to ease their pain of feeling unloved and overlooked.  However, we don’t have to–if we know how precious we are, both in (I believe) God’s sight and others’ sight.

Here are some reasons why every human you encounter (yes, including yourself) is very precious:

  1. Every human being has a complex, intricate body. (source:  http://www.dandydesigns.org/id57.html)– For instance, think of the complexity of the brain itself, having (count them!) three trillion nerve cells being coordinated by it!  We have 131 million nerve receptors in our eyes! We have 35 million gland cells in our digestive tract so that it will digest food and not itself.  Think of all the muscles it takes to walk or to smell, to sleep, or even to eat! Wow! We have a complex body.  Think about it for yourself…
  2. Every human being has something to teach us.–Whether the person has boundless energy or is bedbound, we can learn some great things when we interact with another person.  I have learned so much from those around me, including, but not limited to, my family and friends, my co-workers, my managers, and even customers I only meet once. We not only learn the basics like their name, their interests, and maybe about their families but sometimes also their personalities and how to better relate to them. This is true even with the people we don’t get along with well. For instance, I have had some peers who made fun of me and tormented me during my years in school, but what I learned from them is how NOT to be, and to instead value others as people and not commodities.
  3. Every human being has something to contribute to society.-–Whether the person is always up and about and works 80 hours a week, or is bedbound because he or she is very sick, he or she can contribute to society. How can the bed bound person contribute to society, one may ask? They can contribute by. a.) Helping the able bodied people appreciate what they have more.  b.) Through prayer, if the bed bound person is spiritual. c.) Helping the able-bodied person be able to be a blessing and serve the bed bound person.  The person who is always up and about, of course, contributes by working hard and by serving others.  Whether bedbound, disabled, or able-bodied, no human being is worthless! We all have infinite value.
  4. Every human being has a story to tell.–Everybody I have met has a story to tell us. In their stories, we can not only learn more about them and life but how their stories weave into our own.  For instance, when I met my friend V, she just moved from another state, and I had been in my now former church for a couple of years. I welcomed her, and as time went on, learned more about her life story (her family, how she got to where she was, her future plans and goals, etc…) and it interwove with mine (She got to know who my family was, my future plans and goals, and how I got to where I was..). This can be repeated for every human being I have ever encountered, not just my family and friends. It can be even a brief encounter, but once we meet someone and learn their story, our lives intersect, in a way, forever.

So whether you are White, Black, or another race or ethnicity, tall or short, fat or thin, rich or poor, or any other human identifier, you are indeed a very precious human being.  Because we are so precious, let us treat each other that way, and not as commodities to be used, but as the treasures we all are.  Who can you love today?

PS: This is the 100th post! 🙂 I wanted to commemorate all the readers of this blog with this post!